dragonblade0's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- layered stress... what are you supposed to do when you know a friend is slowly but surely cancelling out the good factors in her life? it's kind of scaring me. i think she knows exactly what she's doing, too, this isn't just a coincidental string of events. and i may not know whats actually happening, but i know what i see. first of all she's hardly eating. she does, but not really enough. she'd trying to lose weight, which is fine, i can understand that, she's not a tiny person. however i've always thought she looks fantastic. but it worries me how little she eats. of course, if this was her only issue i could probably deal with it with a smile. but thats only the bottom layer. layer two - she practically never sleeps anymore. it's a proven fact that we, as human beings, NEED sleep. it's seriously damaging if we don't get enough of it. scientists have no idea what it is or why we need it, but we do. and to be geting so little sleep, probably 4 hours on average.... theres no WAY that can be good. add that to a lack of food and you've got one seriously deprived mind and body. layer 3 - (there's more) guys. fucking guys. this layer will be broken up into 3 sublayers for easy comprehension.
layer 4 - she stresses out about her home life. i mean, it's probably noty a huge influence at this exact moment in time, but they don't have the greatest amount of money, and she's always worried about that. it's a concern that's been pushed to the backburner... not exactly relevant but there all the same. layer 5 - she's had a history of being depressed. i mean, we all have our down days. but hse falls into them fairly oftem it would seem, sometimes feeling like she wants to do something serious. fortuneately she hasn't lately... though she's got a decent scar forming on her arm. this in particular scares me. i'm terrified things are going to crash and burn and she'll be left in the smoldering wreckage with nothing left. no smiles, too many tears and taunting memories. she can be good at hiding it though, if she so choses. i would vote she's not happy right now. she only lets it show every once in a while... but i feel it there. i've got the horrible feeling this is just going down... and it seriously scares me. i'm worried and concerned. gauranteed i don't know the whole story, or everything thats going on. i don't claim i know exactly what goes on in her head, her world. but i do know what i see, and what i feel. i just hope everything goes ok.... 10:46 a.m. - 2004-02-20 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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